I’ve read countless articles about how daily affirmations can improve your life.
It’s said that daily affirmations can improve your way of life or even turn things around to go your way. I’m going to call bogus on that. Sorry if I just burst your bubble.
It’s not that I’m not a believer in daily affirmations, but rather, I only believe that they are an aid- more like a daily reminder to yourself, which is truly no different than any of the most cliche quotes. And, if I’m being really honest, most of these affirmations actually make me feel down. You see, just because you say something, that doesn’t make it true.
Example: Saying “I’m financially stable,” doesn’t make it so. The fact that I am struggling only adds to my worries and makes me sad. The affirmation doesn’t make me forget that I have debt, nor does it erase the debt.
However, affirmations (reminders) are a solid way to help change your mindset. And when I’m tired (which is more often than not lately), those daily affirmations help to reset my core.
They remind me that I’m doing ok, but they don’t make my fears and worries immediately stop.
In case you’re wondering, I’m really tired because I’m a mom. Not because I don’t have help (I have plenty of help from my husband), and not because I’m the only mom who works. I say I’m tired because I’m a mom because since I earned the title of mom 8 years ago, I have not stopped worrying. Worrying is exhausting.
When I’m exhausted, I question every little thing I do. I worry that I’m not good enough, or that someone is judging my parenting. So, this tired mom did something about that. I decided to start using daily affirmations to remind myself that being a tired mom is ok, as long as I reminded myself of the truths.
The Tired Mom’s Daily Affirmations
1. I am raising children who are happy and healthy.
I believe that as we get tired, we forget that we are doing a great job as parents. I often question if I’m involved enough. Do I play enough, do I goof off enough, and do I teach them enough? And the answer is yes. Children have this crazy ability to communicate when something isn’t to their liking. Through words or actions, they let you know! Kids are open and honest if you let them. And my kids let me know when they need me most. Maybe just to cuddle and read, or maybe to color and play.
Each night when I tuck my children into bed, I know that they are fed, healthy, and happy. To the best of my ability, I am their mom. And the smiles, hugs, and kisses I get only solidify this affirmation for me.
I am raising children who are both happy and healthy.
2. I allow my children space to learn and grow.
When my children were babies, I was the definition of a helicopter parent. To this day, I still find nothing wrong with hovering incessantly. But I also see nothing wrong if you don’t parent that way. What I have learned is that kids need to be allowed to learn and grow at their own pace, regardless of how you parent them.
One of the best examples is my daughter and reading. She has struggled with reading for several years. We pushed her to read at night which would only end in tears every single night. This wasn’t productive so we hired a reading tutor, which was great! However, my daughter would only read with the tutor and still refused to work with us. So, what did we do? We stopped asking her to read. Stopped asking how reading was going at school. And to our surprise, she now picks up a book in the morning after breakfast. She asks to read another chapter before bed. We allowed reading to be her choice, and it worked for us.
My children have the space to learn and grow at their own pace.
3. I am grateful for each challenge that I have overcome.
This feeling of gratitude comes in waves, and sometimes it feels like all life is doing is presenting me with challenge after challenge. Yet each time I overcome the challenges I feel stronger, somehow happier, and as if a wave of emotions was lifted because those challenges taught me how to process and release conflict and doubt. Challenges remind you what deserves your focus, and what should be released immediately.
So to those challenges I say… I am grateful.
4. I have a home of abundance.
No, I don’t have a big home filled with fancy things. I don’t have a big home at all, but I do have a home of abundance.
We have a safe home, a healthy home, a warm home, a loving home, and a respectful home. That is the ultimate definition of abundance if you ask me. When I worry that my home projects are not being completed, or my renovation just isn’t happening… I remind myself that I have a home of abundance.
5. I trust that by pushing independence on my children, I’m teaching them valuable lessons.
My children are 6 and 8, so they aren’t babies anymore. I absolutely coddle my children, but I’ve stopped doing simple tasks for them that they can certainly do on their own. They make their own sandwiches or get together their own bowl of yogurt and granola when they want a snack. They can independently do simple tasks that are age-appropriate- and this benefits my kids.
One thing we’ve done recently for our son is focused around his hockey gear. Most practices, he puts on his own gear entirely alone and then my husband checks to make sure his skates are tied tight enough. To some, this is just a matter of getting ready for a sporting event, but to us, we are teaching him the importance of respect and responsibility. How you ask? By putting on his own gear, in the appropriate order to protect his body, he learns to respect his gear and the game. When he just sits there and we do it all for him, what does he learn from that?
Is 6 too young to be learning about respect for sports equipment? I can see how some may feel that way. But to us, teaching our youth hockey player to respect and care for his gear is just as important as the skills he will learn on the ice!
Pushing independence is teaching my children valuable lessons.
6. I have the drive and ambition to follow and achieve my goals.
At the moment I may not be at my peak of achievements, but I will be. I have big goals in place and dreams for myself and my family. And I have both the drive and the ambition to make my goals a reality.
It might not happen overnight, but knowing that I will one day be where I want to be is what makes this affirmation so special. This daily reminder that a tired mom will be able to reach her goals is so meaningful to me.
7. I am not defined by my anxiety and insecurities.
I have suffered from anxiety for 12 years now. I actually didn’t realize the length of time until typing it right now, that’s how much a part of me this anxiety is. I forgot that there was a time that I didn’t suffer from crippling anxiety. Insecurity has always been a part of me, but anxiety has not. To some degree we all have insecurities. But they don’t define you we are.
I do not introduce myself to someone saying, “Hi, I’m Halie. I’m incredibly anxious and insecure to my core.” I don’t do that because these qualities do not define me.
Listen, I know affirmations aren’t for everyone. I get that. I even thought the same. Yet here I am, constantly using daily affirmations as part of my daily routine. They serve as daily reminders that I’m doing all right. That my kids are all right. And that every bump in the road that life throws (because let’s be honest the bumps are inevitable) was done for a purpose.
When I get tired, it often makes me feel down. These daily affirmations are just some of the tools I use to pick myself back up and remind myself that things are never as bad as they may feel.