Second Guessing Yourself

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boy in glassesIt all started one morning about four months ago. My youngest Oakley who is three, woke up and there was something different about him. Was it his new haircut that made his eyes look so different? I couldn’t put my finger on it. At lunch I sat and stared at his beautiful face. There was something different about them. It looked as if one eye was turning in, but it didn’t continuously do it. Hmmm. I decided to let it go because no one else saw it. Both my other kids and my husband all thought he looked fine. So I did just that, I let it go-somewhat.

Something inside me told me not to let it go that there was something wrong with him, but I didn’t listen. That voice was hushed and we continued on all along feeling doubtful. A few weeks later his teacher asked me if I had noticed that his left eye had turned in. Of course I had! I felt sick to my stomach!

How could I have ignored my instinct? It was time to investigate.

I called and made an appointment with Dr. Molly Hastings, a Pediatric Ophthalmologist. She got Oakley in fairly quickly. From the second that we walked in Dr. Hastings and her team made us feel welcome-important. She took Oakley into her office and had him read the eye chart. He did a great job, but I was completely shocked at how poor he could see, +4.50. Next, came a dilation (which lasted for two days). His eyes both turned in a bit, the left more than the right, but his eyes were otherwise healthy. For that I was relieved as a thousand reasons for this were running ramped in my mind. A brain tumor was at the top of this list. As relieved as I was being given the news that Oakley did in fact have a lazy eye (commonly called amblyopia) and not, say a brain tumor, I couldn’t get passed the feeling that I failed him. How could I not have known? It’s my job, right?

According to the CDC, amblyopia is the most common cause of vision impairment in children. (2013) The CDC also says that:

“Unless it is successfully treated in early childhood amblyopia usually persists into adulthood, and is the most common cause of permanent one-eye vision impairment among children and young and middle-aged adults. An estimated 2%–3% of the population suffer from amblyopia.”(2013)

Oakley is now part of that 2-3%.

After the initial shock Dr. Hastings kindly explained how Oakley would need to patch his eye for about an hour a day until his new glasses came in. Oakley picked his favorite color (blue) and left with the biggest smile on his beautiful little face.

About four weeks after mastering patching his glasses came in. My heart still cannot handle how cute this kid is in his glasses!

Please please please take it from me. Do not ignore that voice that tells you that something is wrong! I am so very thankful that everything turned out alright! I am so thankful that Oakley loves his glasses! I am so thankful that he had such an amazing Doctor! I am just so thankful!

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Faith Abair
I am a Mom to four wonderful kids (most of the time) Maddy (October 2002), Natalie (October 2004), Jack (December 2007), and Oakley (August 2011). We live in Colchester and are very lucky to be a part of this wonderful community. I am even luckier to work within this school district. You may also find me coaching one of their teams or chauffeuring to one of their many activities. I am also completing my BS in Marketing/Business. My passion, other than my kids of course, is literacy. I could go on and on about how important the foundation of literacy is. One day I plan to open my own children’s bookstore.

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